Healing

I pulled away from social media last year to give myself some healing time. This was a much needed respite and I’m starting to feel a little motivation seep back into my life. I’m grateful that my body and mind can be so resilient that I’m still here, still breathing – but it does take a lot of mental gymnastics, not gonna lie! Creativity and quilting have always been my go-to activity for emotional healing.

It helps keep me calm, and when/if I finish a project – any project. I have a great sense of relief and accomplishment that helps push me forward. At least that’s how creativity has worked for me in the past.

Things feel different for me now, and I’m desperately trying to get back on my feet – mentally and emotionally speaking. Writing here is a big part of that process. I’ve been writing this blog since 2010 when I first started quilting. I feel like it is my creative home, and right now I’m feeling a little home-sick – so I’m trying to get back to it!

Healing Through Quilting

Quilting is definitely therapeutic for me! The process of design, picking color palates, the feel of the fabric… the excitement of seeing a block come together and the satisfaction of finishing a quilt – is all good for me. Even the problems – or problem solving is emotionally relieving in some way. I can’t really explain it, but I think quilting needs to be my main focus over the few months.

Currently my office/sewing room looks like a tornado went through because I’m rearranging, cleaning, purging and setting up to get busy. I process a lot of my feelings by making things. But right now it’s just so hard to find motivation. I’m trying to push myself with this blog and creating quilting videos on YouTube.

Creating and Marketing

I’ve always been creative. I grew up making my own clothes, drawing, making doll clothes, paint by numbers. I had a lot of fun with Fashion Plates (anyone remember?) Made pillows, bags, curtains and clothes for my daughter. I’ve even made dresses for others from patterns, and made my own wedding dress! After being homeless for a few years, I learned graphic design and worked on show posters, cards, art, and t-shirt designs for screen printing. Color mixing and matching is something I have a natural aptitude for.

Healing through quilting and marketing or sharing on social media are two very different things. As I’m cleaning my closets out, I’m finding many things I’ve made in the past. Part of me wishes I could just throw it all away – but it has too much value to me to do that. So I might have to get over my marketing issues, and will probably be posting some odd things in my store soon.

One fun thing I did recently was to make a linen spray from the lavender I grow in my yard. Larry the lavender plant has been prolific and I’m super happy to be able to harvest and put it to good use. It smells fantastic!! Not so much a perfume, more of an air freshener. I just got some spray bottles and am bottling it up. Another odd thing for my store.

You Never Know

One thing I’m sure of is that you just never know about anything! I never thought I’d be questioning my whole reality at age 57… but here I am. I’m hoping quilting can be my way forward to emotional healing and financial independence. We’ll see how that goes! Right now I’m working in all directions, hoping to put myself in the right place for my best future options.

As I’m cleaning and setting up my workspace – my mind is spinning on what I should make next quilt-wise. While cleaning, I pulled together so many ‘extra’ hexie pieces! Maybe another hexie quilt?! Not sure yet, but I will be documenting my progress for whatever project I start next.

I’m leaning into the feeling of being worthy of better things in life. My personal life is full of feelings I need to process. So I definitely need a project, just to digest my emotions and find the best direction to go forward in. Writing here is cathartic for me. So I’ll be writing about my projects and my emotional processing… I hope it helps. Quilting has always helped before… so you never know!